Ok, not really. But my experience last night was still intense!
So last night we had an event at work and I hung around to make sure everything was in order, have a beer, schoomze, etc. Nothing out of the ordinary. At ten til 7 I get onto the elevator with a girl from another office and a moment later the elevator stops working. “No big deal” I say. “It will only be a minute.” We obviously hit the door open button 1000 times and the number for every floor in the building. Nothing. So we start hitting the emergency bell. Still nothing. My phone amazingly works in the elevator thanks to my recent switch to Verizon and I call my office and co-worker but get no answer from either. I give my phone to the girl stuck with me. She gets her co-worker on the phone who does answer luckily and he got down to business calling people. Meanwhile I text another co-worker out-of-town and he flat-out doesn’t believe me. I literally had to take a picture of the girl stuck with me and text it to him before he changed his mind. Perhaps the office pranks should be curtailed for a while.
So after 15 minutes this girl in the elevator and I are obviously very good friends. We finally get over the fact that we’re really stuck and plop down on the dirty floor, only to realize that the elevator is shaking a little and not really on the ground level although the light says L. So now we’re getting nervous and think its best to plan our escape. “Good thing I have my gym bag” I say, “I’m going to need my tennis shoes to scale that wall.” But just as we planned for her to boost me through the roof of the elevator to shimmy myself up the cables to the floor above us, we realize there is a second phone in the elevator. Please note that she was just as involved in the planning and did not once accuse me of being a crazy person. Maybe we’re soul mates. Anyway, don’t ask me how we missed the other phone initially. Unlike the other “emergency” phone, this one worked. But it only went to one place, which was not located in our area and they put me on hold three times only to be told that the elevator people are an hour away. 40 minutes in we hear someone shouting to tell us there is nothing they can do, so they are calling the fire department. Thanks for the update genius. We’ve only been trapped in a tiny non-air conditioned elevator for 40 minutes. Please take your time. Not to mention that we had no idea that you were there in the first place, whoever you are. I would have called the fire department myself, but after calling home and then leaving a very important facebook update letting my friend know she is the recipient of all of my music if I died, my phone died as well.
So soon after that we hear yelling, banging and cursing. This is great because it means the fire department is here. It is bad because there are having a hell of a time getting us out. Twenty minutes (and make-up touch ups and hair flattening) later, the door is pried open and there are seven glorious firemen looking down upon us. It could be considered heaven to some. “Are you ok in there?” I think my new friend actually giggled. We were not on the ground floor as we expected and were in-between the third and floors (I don’t think we could have plummeted to our deaths from the third floor) so we threw our bags, purses and heels up to them and a fireman jumped in after us. He got down on all fours and told us to “climb on ladies” leading to more giggling. So one at a time we stood on that poor man’s back and were pulled onto the fourth floor by two more firemen.
This is clearly the most exciting thing that’s happened to me in a while. I have no doubt that my years of training as an escape artist (I excel in escaping parents, school and work) would have enabled me to escape on my own, but I much prefer the ending I was given. Thank you, brave firemen. I love you so.
Mommy Needs A Pinot 
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